悪魔の暗界

 

 

这些天呢，发生了很多事情吧，列举下：

1. 6月27日跟小白买了我们的第一辆车---INFINITI!

2. 6月29日参加了同性恋游行（SF的一大特色！！！）

3. 7月1日哥哥生日

4. 7月2日,从学校放学回来,发现我家的车被贴了罚单~FUCK~~~~

5. 明天，美国独立日，由FIREWORK...但是不知道要不要去~~因为风很大捏~跟着学校去，要在海边吹5，6个小时~~~就为了看不到1小时的FIREWORK....感觉很白痴~~~

 

WANNA SAY STH, BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT CAN I SAY...

TO BE CONTINUED...

我彷徨着我的彷徨，痛苦着我的失落，享受着我的幸福！

来美国1个多月了~很多事情还是不明白，我彷徨。。。很多时候我觉得失去了方向，‘fuck, i lost my way!’为什么这样？就算在英国也没这样，就算不开心，我也知道我可以选择回国！可美国不一样，发誓要实现最终梦想的地方，不能轻易放弃，离开的地方！可是，离目标似乎很近，又很远！我可以看到我的目标，他就在前方，可是，当我拼力去抓，去向他前进的时候，我才发现，原来我们相隔的如此遥远！我的梦想，我的目标，如同海市蜃楼般的飘渺虚无！如果在沙漠看到了绿洲的海市蜃楼，旅客就会用尽最后一丝力气走过去，最终死在沙漠中；那么，我会怎样？会死在追寻梦想的旅途上么？最终能达到梦想么？我不清楚，所以我彷徨！

 

我依旧痛苦，一个人的痛苦，两个人的痛苦。。。原来相似的人在一起，只会互相折磨，争吵不断！因为彼此不开心而不开心，最终弄得两个人开始争吵，两个不愿妥协的人，两个各自持有自尊心的人！虽然在改变，却依旧不够，你说你会改变，可是改变了就不是你了，所以我不要求你改变！但是我们会依旧痛苦！我说也许有天我会跑掉，你说会在我要跑掉之前做得更好，不再让我失望！有些麻木的感觉~~~不知道将来是怎样的，但至少现在还是会痛苦，我给自己的伤，你给自己的痛，我相互的伤害！

 

但是我依旧幸福，因为有他，尽管争吵，但依旧幸福~~‘感觉到了美国后，我什么都没做！！’‘没事，什么都由我来先做！’‘为什么？’‘因为我是男人，什么事情都要我先去尝试，弄明白了再告诉你，让你去做！’不知道为什么，第一次觉得被他如此的宠着！第一次，留下了幸福的泪！虽然痛苦，但我依旧幸福着！

 

ps:感谢蕊蕊那天听我唠叨~~埃~~

    恭喜小白顺利考下加州驾照！

    你们谁有空来看看我娃~~~~啊啊啊啊啊啊~~~我无聊呢~~~

 

 

人生的路有许多的选择，托子说人们选择不同的方式去走，有的用腿，有的坐车，而她选择直达的航班！

 

我呢？其实我也不知道我在用什么方式走，也许是在用腿吧，传说中的11路！呵呵～～不过我知道，我选择了漂泊不定的人生，生活中充满了不可预知的事情，危险重重，有惊喜连连～～其实，并不喜欢这样的生活，因为太多的不可预知，不符合我的性格，我是那种喜欢有固定生活模式的生活的人，可是我去选择了完全与我性格相反的生活方式，很多时候，我会觉得累，漂泊的太久了，想让自己停下来，好好的休息下，可是最终发觉不可以，不是自己厌倦了安逸的生活，就是被别人的脚步所驱赶了！ 最终，发觉自己原来是这么的漂泊不定，原来还没有什么东西可以把我紧紧地抓牢，原来。。。其实我也不知道了～～额～～思维混乱～～

 

不知道国内的朋友们怎么样了，英国的姐妹们也都陆续回国了～～看着湃湃的文章不知道你有咋了，不过，人生哇，反正就这一次，无论你怎么选择，我们都会支持你，毕竟我们是姐妹，挺你到底！  托托呢，看来已经做好战斗的准备了～～很积极呢！加油！相信你没问题！！  最近和蕊蕊还有田妞儿啥的也都没联系，不知道你们好不好～～唉～～老猫你和崔崔咋样了？啥时候回国？还是都回去了？呃呃～～～

 

唉～～总觉得挺空虚的～身边没啥朋友，但愿过些时候能好些～～怀念哇，怀念当年去sheffield，一起去吃NO. ONE哇，某人吃的又拉又吐，某人吃到流鼻血。。哈哈～～怀念和托子躺在她的大床上，跟她钻一个被窝，谈自己的梦想～～唉～～虽然都过去了，不过记忆犹新哇～～～

 

盼着你们能来美国，但愿我能在美国找到你们这样的好朋友～～anyway，记忆中的东西，永远不会消失的～～～

 

祝愿你们大家幸福快乐～～额～～多想想我～～555

 

今天是国内的周日了～父亲节哪～～～你们没给爸爸祝福的赶紧送上祝福～～～

 

唉～～我去外面溜达溜达了～～唉～无聊～～呼呼～～思念你们～～～

In our life, there have many choices and oppourtunities, there has the door for different ways which we need to choose, before that, they are all closed, we can not see and know what is inside it, so we cannot know which one is the best, the easist and most suitable one for ourselves.

We always ask ourselves question 'what should i do? which one should i choose?'...Whatever, we have to do it, whatever the way is right or wrong, it's the way u choose, keep going, because this is ur way, maybe it is wonderful , make others jealous u, it is ur way; may be u make urself into a hard one, take it easy, it is u own way, nobody can have the same experience with u, they may laugh at u, but the only thing u need to do is holding on, do not try to drop ur life, if u solve all the problem in this way, u will be the best, u must be more shining than others who drop their lives and who have the easy lives! u must be proud of urself!

Remember that, in our life there never have a word 'noway', when u meer problem, try to let urself calm down, try to use ur intelligent brain, solve it, if u think there has noway to go, close ur eyes, just keep going, when u open ur eyes, u will find there has the way under ur feet, so whatever ur meet, however it is really terrible, maybe make u wanna die, do not drop ur life, keep it, because this is ur fate, u can solve it, believe urself!

Still remember, in our life, there have many doors, a door will open ,while one closed, so keep going, do not pay too many attention on what u lost or what u miss, may be they make u life terrible, but past is past, look forward, too see what u have after that is more important!

Fate is fate, believe it, but remember that, it just give many choise for u, how to play is dependent on u!

 

Never feel so bad, if u think u can not stand for ur life or u think u can not keep going, relax urself, find best find to talk it, after than u will feel better, most of time, the event itself dose not give us too many pressure, it is given by ourself, we think too many things, too many experience and knowledge make us crazy, so, what can we do? Try to us a simple way, u will find ur way.

 

Try to think our childhood, we always do lots of crazy things which we think now, but in that time, it is really we wanna do, why? Because we are too simple that time, just do what we think is right. So, try to use the opinion  like that time, u may do crazy things that others can not do!

 

People's life is too short, why do not u do the things we wanna do, do not left pity in our life, fail is  not the worst thing, make a pity is the most terrible thing!

 

Everybody, find ur shining point and try to be urself, to find ur own way, if u r luky u will find  friends on ur way.

 

Now I am  really in bother, there do not have too much time for me to think, and there do not have too many choices for me, but i still have the general  target for my life and our life, i do not care what i have to do now or in the future, because i know i must achive my target, so i believe that i can find my way, and i have to!

 

My life is in my hands, and keep going....